The GOLDEN GLOBES: RUNNING DIARY

(Running Diary of the GLobes)
Ricky opened with plenty of penis jokes and the requisite Jay leno joke: “Let’s get on with it before NBC replaces me with Jay Leno." Glad he ripped on Keifer and his OFFICE protege.
Nicole Kidman’s dress looks like a night gown.
Vera Farmiga looks like a Twilight vampire. Speaking of which, so does Anna Kendrick….
Boo! Monique won. Definitely needs more material for that dress. I want to revel in her experience, but I find myself being only annoyed. (O for 1)
Jennifer Garner definitely had stuff done to her lips. They look so fake. I’m not saying I don’t like them. .
I wonder who Lea Michelle (Glee) is at the awards with
Toni Collette won Best Actress (0 for 2). Toni does a great British accent. I wonder if she’s getting ready for some bio piece, so that she needs to practice this voice.I think Madonna could help her hone it a little bit.
Boy, Lauren Graham is stunning. Jim Parsons is kind of hot too.
•Jeremy Piven looks exactly like my friend Brett Strom
•Lithgow wins (1 for 3). Guess I need to catch up on Dexter soon.
So UP was the obvious winner here. Nothing really to say except that I hope it gets nominated for Best Picture at the Oscars.
Great nod to history, as Ricky remarks on how the Golden Globes used to be for sale.
So Felicity Huffman either can’t read or she is drunk. My guess is both.
Michael Hall wins best actor in a tv Drama (1 for 4). I don’t want to say that this is a pity joke, but it sort of is (he has cancer).
So Elliot Spitzer’s wife won best actress in TV Drama (1 for 5). Quality shot at NBC, as she cites CBS’s faith in the “ten o’clock drama.”
Harrison Ford looks so pissed. Maybe another earring would help him loosen up.
Ricky took a shot at Sir Paul’s divorce. Excellent.
Who is the transvestite Christina Aguilera is sharing the stage with????
Amy Adams looks terrible, like she just got out of bed. I honestly think I despise her.
So it would appear that Drew Barrymore is back together with Justin Long. I like that, because there’s a chance they both could die in the same accident that way.
Only at the Golden Globes does Duplicity get an award nomination.
Meryl Streep wins for Julie and Julia (2 for 6). She is so charming. There is nothing she can’t do, except humility.
No one is paying attention to Helen Mirren. I enjoy that.
Sam Worthington=Russell Crow 2.0
Kevin Bacon is asking people about the cash prize and where he can invest it.
You heard that right, there’s going to be a fourth Shrek movie.
So Jason Reitman won best screenplay (2 for 7), which makes me rethink my Best Picture Drama pick. Too bad I can’t change it now, but if I could I would.
I wish Tracy Morgan would have accepted for Alec Baldwin (3 for 8)
In the immortal words of Tony Kornheiser, “Sophie Lauren is still getting it done.”
(4 for 9) Mad Men wins Best Drama. Suck it Serial killers, vampires and doctors. The cast of Mad Men look nothing like the people they play. That’s acting!
(4 for 10) No love for Jane Lynch as Big Love’s Chloe Something (that’s how it is pronounced) steal’s the award. Her dress getting ripped was karma.
(5 for 11) Everyone’s favorite Nazi, other than Sergeant Shultz, wins!
Leo Dicaprio and Bob DeNiro, also known as Muse #2 and Muse #1 for Martin Scorsese. I like that DeNiro can be funny when not playing a mobster or Ben Stiller’s father-in-law.
Ricky Gervais should host everything. Great dig at Mel Gibson, who probably shouldn’t be referencing a movie about Jews in the wake of his murky past with these people.
The Director of Aquaman won best director! (6 for 12)
Guess I should have betted against Glee. (6 for 13). Not happy that it won, since it has only been on the air for half a season. But boy, the women on this show are so hot!
I would have watched THE HANGOVER with Mike Tyson playing the Zak Galifianakis role. So I picked (500) Days of Summer to win best Comedy/Musical, (6 for 14) but I’m happy The Hangover won. Didn’t think they had a chance coming into this, since it seems odd that they would acknowledge this ridiculous movie.
It would be easy to make Golden Globe jokes about all the big globes on display (Joan from Mad Men), but I’m glad I waited for something more substantial. Well, my reward was the golden face of Mickey Rourke, who apparently turned himself golden for the performance and brought a golden statue woman with him.
Mickey Rourke seems less pleased than Harrison Ford to be presenting. I’m angrier than both now that Sandra Bullock won a Golden Globe (6 for 15). I’m livid that she won. Never actually saw THE BLIND SIDE, but I watched those trailers and didn’t need to see “Remember the Titans 3: Desperate Housewives Endeavor.”
Another travesty (6 for 16) with Downey Jr winning. Glad he gets to make a speech, though, since he is hilarious. I just wish he would hand off that award to someone more deserving.
Overplayed the bias of the Foreign Press (6 for 17) as Jeff Bridges wins Best Actor.
I picked INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS, but I’m totally regretting it now. I think Up in the Air is going to win, and I would change if I could. Apparently, though, it didn’t matter, since Avatar won. Maybe I’ll have to see it now (6 for 18).