How USA Network Found its Groove

(A version of this column might run in The Scene)
On June 5th the USA network debuted its new dramedy Royal Pains, as part of the network’s quest to offer the hippest fare on television.
Genre specific channels aren’t new, with some conceived for the sole purpose of covering food, classic movies or Jon and Kate. Yet now channels like TBS, TNT and USA, which were once resigned to reruns and B grade movies, have begun crafting their own identities. TBS is the comedy outlet, serving as the refuge for all things Tyler Perry, home to My Boys, and recently tried (but failed) to get new episodes of My Name Is Earl. TNT went a different route, to the point where they confidently claim to “know drama” and have learned that female driven dramas need a home too.
In the summer of 2002 USA premiered Monk, which represented a renewed attempt at credibility in original content in the wake of shows like Pacific Blue. Monk was worthy of a major network in terms of star power, with lead Tony Shalhoub, but was too quirky to generate mainstream appeal.
But they weren’t all hits like Monk, and USA struggled to repeat its success. They developed sci-fi shows like The 4400, which was either before its time or too late depending on your point of view, and The Dead Zone, which had an unremarkable run.

The channel abandoned the eclectic route in 2006 and rekindled the magic of Monk by essentially copying it with Psych. Psych was a light romp that made for easy viewing, but more significantly made positive headway with the coveted younger viewers (you know, the ones with all that disposable income because their parents still pay for everything).
Seizing on the momentum from Psych they attempted to champion the youth market, and this led to Burn Notice. The splashy action drama had laughs, sex appeal, and a hip ( an imperative) star that guys wanted to emulate, to the point where my roommate
developed an uncomfortable man crush.
Embracing a female hipster USA premiered In Plain Sight one year later in 2008. This show followed the same formula, inserting a comical side kick, sexual tension, and an awkward level of sincerity that dooms USA dramas like Monk and Burn Notice.
Now Royal Pains is poised to be the next hit for USA, as the show learned the recipe for success. In fact, it is eerily similar to its lead in, Burn Notice, with the most visible similarity being both casts’ affinity for sunglasses. Sunglasses, though, are just part of a tired formula that’s used to distract and dazzle viewers, which includes bright colored shirts, a constant narration of events, and tons of superfluous shots of scantily clad women to offer a pseudo taste of risqué cable behavior.
If it sounds like I’m fed up with these shows it’s because I stopped swallowing them a long time ago and am still trying to get the taste out of my mouth. Psych is the only show worth watching since it doesn’t strive to be something it’s not. In Plain Sight, Burn Notice, and now Royal Pains would be fine if they didn’t pretend to be serious shows with deep undertones, as illustrated by the constant harping about America’s failed healthcare system on Royal Pains
The morality lectures asides and withholding judgment on the love story, Royal Pains is a watchable show. Lead Mark Feuerstein is charming enough, and while there are no man crushes yet, there’s still time. Comedic sidekick Paulo Costanzo is the saving grace of the show, although his relentless banter may start to annoy soon.
Assembly line produced shows aren’t necessarily a bad thing, especially if you find a successful model, but now the product is getting old and USA network needs to revitalize itself before it falls into a rut, because television stations don’t get federal bailouts.

Burn Notice airs Thursdays at 9 pm and at 10 pm is Royal Pains, but you’re better off watching Alias and House on DVD.

Royal Pains is Surprisingly Painless

I wanted to hate "Royal Pains" on USA network, which debuted Thursday after "Burn Notice." Based on the previews and the USA's track record I thought the show was simply "Burn Notice," USA's pride and joy, all wrapped up in new packaging.
If you think about it, it really makes sense. "Burn Notice" is a guy kicked out of his old profession who is using his old skills to do good in an nontraditional manner. He's got a hot friend and he's got a comic relief friend.

Now for "Royal Pains" you've got Dr. Hank, played by Mark Feuerstein (The West Wing and Good Morning Miami), serving as your dislocated star who is trying to find his bearings and while doing that is using his skills to help the beleaguered victims of the Hamptons. Yes, on this show you're supposed to feel sorry for the super rich, who just can't go to the local hospital because it's a death trap, and therefore need the help of a concierge doctor.
Dr. Hank also has arm candy, in the form of his super aggressive assistant Divya (Reshma Shetty). The comic relief is Hank's brother Evan (Paulo Costanzo from "joey" and "Road trip").

In comparison to their "Burn" counterparts I find Fiona (Gabrielle Anwar), Michael Westen's beau on "Burn," to be more compelling than Divya. Maybe not as hot, but definitely providing an emotional depth that is lacking in Divya's character, which can be explained by the fact that Divya is not Dr. Hank's love interest, and more of a two dimensional character that sort of falls more under comic relief.
In that case, Dr. Hank's love interest is far less compelling than Fiona, but mostly because Feuerstein's Hank is a terrible flirt and really kills any scene he's in when he's trying to be charming.

The redeeming star of the show is Costanzo's Evan, who made the show entirely watchable for me. His one liners in the premiere should make him a candidate for a role in a Will Ferrell or Judd Apatow movie. He blows his "Burn" counterpart, Bruce Campbell's Sam, out of the water. That's a noteworthy feat since Sam is a huge facet of "Burn's" success.

All in all, Evan kept me laughing long enough to gloss over the flaws in the show, like the fact that it is basically a watered down version of "House" and "Burn Notice." It seems he'll have a medical mystery every week, while dealing with the underlining themes of a failing healthcare system and Dr. Hank trying to get his job back. All of which seems pretty boring and unwatchable, aside from the occasional laughs from Evan.

BUT, the saving grace of the show could be if it approaches each week with the mindset of "Psych" or most episodes of "Monk." These other USA hits rarely take themselves too seriously, and it's part of the reason why they work. You just sit back and enjoy the show for what it is, nothing more and nothing less. That's in comparison to "In Plain Sight" and a majority of "Burn Notice" episodes, which take themselves far too seriously and make me want to gag.

If Pains just treats itself like the light, fluffy, enjoyable show that it's yearning to be, and not a think piece with a heart, then I will continue to turn in and you should too.